I’m bringing back an Old Blog.  Going Retro for Father’s Day!

What I’ve learned in LIFE! Dad’s Rock!

June19

Dad, now that I’m a parent myself, I know what you and mom went through…HELL.

  • Dad, my kids often remind me of myself and my siblings when I was a kid- happy now?  Sure go ahead and laugh.
  • Summer eating is fun; since all the men want to be chefs, especially competitive dads, they want to bar-b-que where no man has bbq before!  Go for it!
  • Dad, whenever I run into life’s little problems- I think back to all the advice you’ve given me.  Damn, I wish I would have been listening.
  • Sure grandpa, now that the kids are all jacked up on candy and sodas, it’s time to take them back to mom and dad.
  • Dad, can you offer any helpful advice on raising teenagers?  Uh, pointing and laughing isn’t advice.
  • On Mother’s Day my kids brought me breakfast in bed.  On Father’s Day the only way my hubby is getting breakfast in bed is if he sleeps in the kitchen.
  • I learned that my hubby shouldn’t complain about all my pairs of shoes.  He has twice as many wrenches that he never uses.
  • Why does he have so many different size and shape wrenches anyway?
  • When our dryer broke, my husband said he could fix it…if he had the right size wrench!
  • I learned that hunting through a man’s toolbox is worse than a man hunting through a ladies purse.
  • I learned how to remove a cork from a bottle of wine without an opener, leave it in the freezer overnight.
  • There’s something about the hot weather that makes some people get a little frisky with their fashion choices.   Edgy stilettos and barely-there short dresses, really?
  • I’m still trying to figure out when Hawaiian Bermuda shorts, Jackie-O sunglasses, and tank tops went out- of- style?  Where’s Miuccia Prada when I need her?
  • I learned that faux tanners don’t work for me; I end up looking like a sick zebra.
  • When did Military styles come back?  I just sold all my cargo pants and camouflage at my garage sale only to find the same get-ups at the department stores.
  • Wait, that’s skinny pants with cargo pockets to be worn with double platforms and a sequin tee?  Never mind.
  • My diet is a constant battle between, sweetened or unsweetened, broiled or fried, chocolate or double chocolate.
  • I bought some herbal tea that is supposed to help my memory but I forgot where I put it.
  • I learned it’s probably time to cut back on the chlorine in the pool when the beach ball melts.
  • Smoke bacon explosion, smoke duck, and smoked cheesecake… count me in.
  • After football, basketball and hockey…at last baseball & golf, two whistle free sports most men can sleep through.
  • I want to get chocolate wasted!
  • Now that summer is here, I don’t have to cook breakfast for the kids because they wake up at noon.
  • You shouldn’t be eating candy so early. We have donuts.
  • I learned that you don’t choose your family; they are god’s gift to you.

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads in the world!

What are you doing for Father’s Day?  What did you learn in LIFE?

 Dad birdhouse